I’ll take “Bad Advice” for $500, Alex.
If you know you’ve fucked up, apologize. It doesn’t invalidate that they messed up, but it does admit where you did, and open a chance to fix things. Too many relationships, from friendships to marriages, fall apart because one person wouldn’t apologize even though they knew they were wrong.
I’ll take “Not reading things properly” for £500, Alex.
Note I didn’t say “Don’t apologise, Tara”, but “don’t be *the first* to apologise”
Noah needs to show some signs of maturing by being the first to apologise for this latest car crash
Polar
In real life, you don’t know that though. If you wait for them to apologize first, then there’s a good chance things will never get resolved, because if you want them to apologize first, you don’t want resolution, you want to win. It shows that, despite you KNOWING you messed up, you refuse to admit and own up to that mistake until they admit to theirs, which is childish and/or self-centered.
Did Tara overreact? I mean, yes, she admitted as much.
But if your takeaway is “Nothing Noah and Sarah did warranted that” then I’m sorry you just haven’t taken a split second to try and understand why she acted the way she did. But I can spell it out frankly
As Tara noted – If that was the one sole bit of silliness that Sarah and Noah had done, that’d be one thing. But Noah had given NO inclination that this was going to stop. This was part of a pattern of being disruptive and silly and a nuisance. And he just moved in next door to Tara and Bev.
“Is this it? Is this going to be my future? Is my brother going to be obnoxious and intruding every single day in my life?”
Yeah, no shit she snapped at that possibility and drew a line.
This wasn’t just “a little silly.” This was the continuation of a pattern that had been going on for most of their life. And she had no way of knowing if this would ever come to an end. Her reaction was justified. The problem is, we now see it was also unneeded.
Yes, she should apologize, reopen dialogue, and get things settled before this becomes a problem. This also gives Noah a chance to tell her what’s going on so they can all be chill.
The impression I got was that it was a ‘last straw’ type reaction. Also, it was the heat of the moment – now that the emotion has passed, both she and Noah seem to be realising they need to have a serious talk.
Nothing WE have seen justified her reaction. She makes it very clear that Noah has always been a little troll. A tiny pinprick is not a serious injury, but getting regularly poked with a needle for years and years will break anyone.
Yeah, it’s exactly that. When judging Tara’s reaction we should remember that we don’t see everything, especially not all the years before the comic starts. But not having see it doesn’t mean that Tara haven’t lived through those years, facing her lovely but silly, and sometime annoying, brother’s shenanigans.
And we also seen thing that Tara don’t know yet. Like the fact that both Noah and Sarah matured a lot since they live together.
It’s nice to see they’re both realizing they went too far this time, both in action and reaction. Now they just need to sit down and square it away before the damage becomes irreparable and resentment sets in.
I still think we only have these comics as context. This is as Tara said the last straw, so I’m reckon there were many offscreen straws leading up to this point.
I do love how both sibs aren’t making the SO join in the hatefest.
There’s no hatefest to join in on, though. Both Tara and Noah are acknowledging they went too far, without self-flagellating too much (both are taking all of the blame on themselves, but only in a ‘I screwed up here’ way, not in a ‘I’m a bad person’ way – though I do suspect Tara might be spiralling down there if Bev wasn’t being reassuring).
I am not sure the Last Hoorah thing is overall such a good idea. What are the odds these two goofballs are just going to stop doing shenanigans cold turkey after that and if they just did, would that make things really all that better? Being goofballs is, you know, kinda a loadbearing part of their personalities?
I think it’s scaling. This was their last “Big Joke.” From here out, it may be smaller things, but nothing on the scale of Experimental Theatre to Announce Our Ace Relationship” levels of stuff. Remember, these jokers would do week long events designed to get Tara riled up.
I still can’t get behind Tara’s reaction. Literally all they did was move next door and invite them for a silly dinner. That’s it. They didn’t throw things at her, didn’t booby-trap anything, and didn’t harass her repeatedly. They were just silly. It really seems like Tara is trying to “mature” and is upset that Noah is still being his same goofy self. The only bad thing he’s done is move next door and honestly? I can think of wayyyyy worse neighbors.
I think it’s that she can handle it in small doses (e.g. Christmas). But now that he’s moved in next door, she thinks it’s going to be daily – i.e. non-stop.
Okay, but imagine your one sanctuary away from a person who makes a habit of annoying you is now right next door to that person. There is no getting away from them anymore. They’re always there, with some little needling joke, or prank, or silly little activity designed to irritate you. Every. Single. Day. That’s what Tara was envisioning. Every Day, just more of All of This. Every time they’re around each other, Noah is doing something to irritate Tara. Add Sarah to the mix, and you have a feedback loop of silliness that would drive a Saint to murder.
20 thoughts on “Over for Dinner #6”
dysartes
Stay strong, Tara – don’t be the first to apologise.
Striker2054
I’ll take “Bad Advice” for $500, Alex.
If you know you’ve fucked up, apologize. It doesn’t invalidate that they messed up, but it does admit where you did, and open a chance to fix things. Too many relationships, from friendships to marriages, fall apart because one person wouldn’t apologize even though they knew they were wrong.
dysartes
I’ll take “Not reading things properly” for £500, Alex.
Note I didn’t say “Don’t apologise, Tara”, but “don’t be *the first* to apologise”
Noah needs to show some signs of maturing by being the first to apologise for this latest car crash
Polar
In real life, you don’t know that though. If you wait for them to apologize first, then there’s a good chance things will never get resolved, because if you want them to apologize first, you don’t want resolution, you want to win. It shows that, despite you KNOWING you messed up, you refuse to admit and own up to that mistake until they admit to theirs, which is childish and/or self-centered.
Albert Sousa
Sounds like they are going to make the change in their relationship status public.
Striker2054
I think that was the plan. They just did it in a very obnoxious way, and it backfired.
Sam Burnett
Tara needs to apologise pronto. Her brother and partner acted a little silly. Nothing justified that reaction from her.
Kyman201
Did Tara overreact? I mean, yes, she admitted as much.
But if your takeaway is “Nothing Noah and Sarah did warranted that” then I’m sorry you just haven’t taken a split second to try and understand why she acted the way she did. But I can spell it out frankly
As Tara noted – If that was the one sole bit of silliness that Sarah and Noah had done, that’d be one thing. But Noah had given NO inclination that this was going to stop. This was part of a pattern of being disruptive and silly and a nuisance. And he just moved in next door to Tara and Bev.
“Is this it? Is this going to be my future? Is my brother going to be obnoxious and intruding every single day in my life?”
Yeah, no shit she snapped at that possibility and drew a line.
Striker2054
This wasn’t just “a little silly.” This was the continuation of a pattern that had been going on for most of their life. And she had no way of knowing if this would ever come to an end. Her reaction was justified. The problem is, we now see it was also unneeded.
Yes, she should apologize, reopen dialogue, and get things settled before this becomes a problem. This also gives Noah a chance to tell her what’s going on so they can all be chill.
Danny B
The impression I got was that it was a ‘last straw’ type reaction. Also, it was the heat of the moment – now that the emotion has passed, both she and Noah seem to be realising they need to have a serious talk.
Shay
Nothing WE have seen justified her reaction. She makes it very clear that Noah has always been a little troll. A tiny pinprick is not a serious injury, but getting regularly poked with a needle for years and years will break anyone.
a reader among thousands
Yeah, it’s exactly that. When judging Tara’s reaction we should remember that we don’t see everything, especially not all the years before the comic starts. But not having see it doesn’t mean that Tara haven’t lived through those years, facing her lovely but silly, and sometime annoying, brother’s shenanigans.
And we also seen thing that Tara don’t know yet. Like the fact that both Noah and Sarah matured a lot since they live together.
Striker2054
It’s nice to see they’re both realizing they went too far this time, both in action and reaction. Now they just need to sit down and square it away before the damage becomes irreparable and resentment sets in.
Good for Thought
I still think we only have these comics as context. This is as Tara said the last straw, so I’m reckon there were many offscreen straws leading up to this point.
I do love how both sibs aren’t making the SO join in the hatefest.
Kamino Neko
There’s no hatefest to join in on, though. Both Tara and Noah are acknowledging they went too far, without self-flagellating too much (both are taking all of the blame on themselves, but only in a ‘I screwed up here’ way, not in a ‘I’m a bad person’ way – though I do suspect Tara might be spiralling down there if Bev wasn’t being reassuring).
Witch of many Jobs
I am not sure the Last Hoorah thing is overall such a good idea. What are the odds these two goofballs are just going to stop doing shenanigans cold turkey after that and if they just did, would that make things really all that better? Being goofballs is, you know, kinda a loadbearing part of their personalities?
Striker2054
I think it’s scaling. This was their last “Big Joke.” From here out, it may be smaller things, but nothing on the scale of Experimental Theatre to Announce Our Ace Relationship” levels of stuff. Remember, these jokers would do week long events designed to get Tara riled up.
Satyr
I still can’t get behind Tara’s reaction. Literally all they did was move next door and invite them for a silly dinner. That’s it. They didn’t throw things at her, didn’t booby-trap anything, and didn’t harass her repeatedly. They were just silly. It really seems like Tara is trying to “mature” and is upset that Noah is still being his same goofy self. The only bad thing he’s done is move next door and honestly? I can think of wayyyyy worse neighbors.
Danny B
I think it’s that she can handle it in small doses (e.g. Christmas). But now that he’s moved in next door, she thinks it’s going to be daily – i.e. non-stop.
Striker2054
Okay, but imagine your one sanctuary away from a person who makes a habit of annoying you is now right next door to that person. There is no getting away from them anymore. They’re always there, with some little needling joke, or prank, or silly little activity designed to irritate you. Every. Single. Day. That’s what Tara was envisioning. Every Day, just more of All of This. Every time they’re around each other, Noah is doing something to irritate Tara. Add Sarah to the mix, and you have a feedback loop of silliness that would drive a Saint to murder.